The Finale: Best of Villains' Month

How does one judge a comic event? On readability alone? On the event's impact on the company's universe? Should gimmicks factor? Villains Month was very readable in the way buzzfeed articles are readable. Occasionally, there's a really good one, but usually they're just something to focus on with your eyes. A handful of books this month were awesome, most were good-fine, a few were boring. But overall, if you're curious to read a ton of villain stories, you won't be massively disappointed. Though, it seems pretty obvious at the end of Forever Evil everything goes back to normal--I wouldn't be surprised if nothing changes in any book. Maybe it'll herald Justice League of Canada to trump J.L. America. Finally, the 3-D covers: will anyone give a shit about these when they see them in back issue bins of the future? My guess is: only ironically. The best thing I can say about these 3-D pics were that they make the book sturdier. With only 3 or 4 exceptions, most of these looked fucking dumb. They kinda moved; not really though. In a time where the average person has familiarity with 3-D rendering of 2-D images (movies; 3DS video games; TVs; etc.), this holographic, tilt-your-head-right shit just doesn't cut it. Why not just draw better covers? Frank Quitely drew in 3-D in We3; make covers like that! Maybe DC just found a box of holographic paper, or something. Gotta make money somehow, I guess?

Below, I recommend 18 books of the 56 books. That's a pretty bad ratio. However, almost every book was readable. Most were boring. Less than five comics were totally confusing. Nothing especially offended me (however, the way DC marketing demands women be represented on book covers is gross). But no one is going to be talking about these issues very much come Wednesday, Oct. 2. Let's tally the points, yes?

Week 1 garnered 47 points out of 65.

Week 2 garnered 49 points out of 65

Week 3 garnered 48 points out of 70

Week 4 garnered 45 points out of 60

The Villains' Month grand point total comes out to out of 189 points 260 points possible.

That gives Villains Month a C- in point quality, which is more or less exactly how I feel about it. The above mentioned books worth reading were good--nothing especially spectacular--but everything was pretty readable. The problem is, every book had so many expectations to meet. They had to either a) set up a story line in an upcoming series arc or tie-in mini-series or b) try and develop the Forever Evil story that's coming out way to fricking slow. I bet that book's last issue won't even sell a quarter of what the first issue sells because who's going to care about this semi-interesting, yet ineffectual, event in April 2014? Why didn't they release one a week? There must be some reason...maybe they hope Forever Evil will sell well thanks to the tie-in mini-series' that surround it (Arkham War, a Superman one, I think a third). However, if they just did release a Forever Evil each week, with a different artist drawing the book they could have had an event with more cohesion and more reason to read all the issues. I don't think the editors expected readers to want to read all the issues, but rather were hoping you'd just pick up ones that sounded neat. I feel like if the issues were all trying to see out the same great premise, what would villains do if the heroes were dead, the comics would have all been better. Like, what if these tyrants ruled everything scenarios. However, most of the books were origin stories. Even already-established New 52 villains retold their origins (Sinestro, Croc, Harley Quinn, tons more) I'm tired of origin stories, New 52! It's second year now! This is what you restarted for!


And another thing: is it even useful to quantify the qualitative judgements I gave these comics? My opinions were greatly skewed upon a) my preference or pre-familiarity to the character), or b) if I liked the writer/artist already. I tried not to grade like this, but I liked every Kindt story except one; I enjoyed Marv Wolfman and Jim Starlin's origin stories, even though they were wordy and didn't feel very New 52. I also think I goofed up by making the point values so high. With these books, there was little difference between 3s and 4s, 2s and 3s. The next time I mass review books, my scale will be

3 - Great! Really enjoyed it, highly recommend it. Lots to think about.

2 - Fine. Enjoyable enough, as popular media is designed to be. Nothing especially thought provoking.

1 - Bad book. Hard to follow or very boring. Looks stupid. Not worth reading.

0 - Laughably bad. How did they fuck it up so much? I'm angry, this is a score of anger. So, read it?



Now, if you just want to read the good ones, here's a place to start. I didn't go back and look at scores for this; I just chose the ones that stood out as good in my memory.

Batman had a lot of books each week (4) and it was the only part of the DCU that had a unified plot for the books. The lot ranges from good to average. These are my favorites most to all-most. Joker's Daughter introduced a seemingly-gimmicky new character into the New 52 in a smart and compassionate way. She's a weird teen who hurts herself and often realizes she's too powerful for even herself to control. I feel really bad for this homeless schizo. Ventriloquist further revealed the backstory of Gail Simone's reimagining of this old character. I used to think Albert Fish and his little doll were a total joke; Simone's version, however, is quite horrifying. This is exactly what I want the New 52 to do: reimagine and reinvigorate old characters (it was a semi-origin story as this character already appeared in Batgirl). Snyder's crew did well with Riddler, providing a pretty great riddle and no more origin re-hashing. Matt Kindt managed to do a really great origin story by hybridize the many Harley Quinn origin stories that have existed throughout her many media appearances (even though I think Suicide Squad did this). Mr. Freeze was a continuation on the story set up in the Batman anual last year. It also distinguished this Mr. Freeze from the one he's based on (the Animated series version) by making him much more insane. He used to love his wife, now he loves an idea of his wife that he made up because he's nuts. Man-Bat was pretty good too! He fought She-Bat. Honestly, if you just read the Batman books you'd have read the best part of this event. But that's a given since Batman's always had the best villains, right?

Superman, on the other hand, always had stupid villains in my opinion. Not that they weren't cool, but they were usually literally stupid, brutish, and strong. They still are, kind of. But Greg Pak did a great job fleshing out the world of Krypton before the explosion. We see how Zod betrayed his people, Doomsday got a hold of the negative zone, Cyborg Superman was a post-Kypton invention, and how Braniac came and blew it up and more. Also, with all these crisis happening at once, it makes sense that the utopia was able to be destroyed by a robot army (they had defenses down due to something else). If it wasn't for the rest of the books, which were all really bad (especially Branaic) this would have been a really great collection of comics. In any event, Greg Pak knows a lot of cool things about Superman.

Matt Kindt did origins for Sinestro and Solomon Grundy that were both neat. Kindt really takes a Grant Morrison approach to origins, embracing the characters' many versions and multiplicities, and finding ways so they can be many things at once. Also, best Solomon Grundy story where the nursery rhyme is integrated I've ever seen. First Born adds an interesting new villain to the Wonder Woman-verse. I'm not caught up, but it seems like this book takes a lot of influence from Sandman and Fables. Plus, the art's real neat.  The Flash's Rogues are always a hoot. The Black Hand is like a black-lantern zombie of the Rot, and I hope he comes back soon. Speaking of the rot, the Arcane book talked of two characters, revealed their past in a non-originy way, and best of all, added a lot to think about to both Snyder's New 52 Swamp Thing and the Swamp Thing-verse in genera (i.e. more Green/Red/Black). And, funny kinda but the only two books I bought this month were: Creeper and Dial E for Enemy. I bought Dial E because it's the end to my favorite series. I bought Creeper because it had three styles of art and a story written by I think three people. Everything added into a weird crazy mish-mash that is so totally Creeper! He's a Japanese samurai ghost now. Isn't that neat?

On DC Villains generally: the defining characterization of DC villains is childhood trauma. This narrative is increasingly more boring to me. First, it's a lame way to win sympathy for a character. Oh, Reverse-Flash isn't responsible for turning time backward and almost ending the universe--it's his dad's fault! Cheetah didn't mean to be a blood hungry savage beast--her mom made her that way! Sheesh who cares? Everybody's got parent problems; few then put on a costume and work out their frustrations in a strange, BDSM-esque ritual with superheroes (who are also usually the product of childhood trauma). How about a villain who's truly ideologically opposed to the ruling hierarchies in society? Or, a super villain who really was profoundly wronged by the hero they choose to arch? Or a demon? I don't know! But not everybody needs to have a bad childhood. That's boring. Enough of that!

Villains' Month pt. 4!

This is it! The final recap! Who's Joker's Daughter?! After I review these last books, I'll tally the points and write a conclusion piece about whether this event was worth anybody's time/money. There's less books this week than any other. Where's Forever Evil 2 already?!

Batman

Joker's Daughter (Batman: The Dark Knight 23.4)

This is the big one. The one DC undercut vendors on orders twice: oh yeah, 3-D covers baby. The one that's pre-selling on eBay for approximately $100--and I'm holding a 3-D with ungloved hands!). Is it because comic speculators are building false demand for a likely scarce quantity? Or, is everyone's excited to find out when Joker had a kid? Well... Before I give massive spoilers (which I will, so preemptive warning), this book is good. It's at times sad, exciting, and most of all, creepy. And it's written by Ann Nocenti, who wrote a lot of solid scripts this month (with this book being the highlight). Joker's Daughter seems to be based on a convincing reality of a teenage outcast high school girl. Especially when she's, (NOW! NOW ARE THE SPOILERS OF THE WHOLE ISSUE!) revealing her quietly abusive childhood. This girl (name yet to be revealed) was born abnormal to parents who praised normativity over everything else. Her face was covered in birth defects, she was obsessed with death and killing, her neurosis started manifesting itself in self-mutilation, and eventually she runs away from a family who already decided to abandon her to a mental institution. Before she leaves home, she cuts off her face. Yes, this is dramatic, but the way it plays out is actually pretty sad. An ugly girl thinks ugliness is the only identity she has to embrace. It reminded me of Dollface from Twisted Metal (but in her case, her male boss cut her face off as sexual punishment) and the protagonist of Chuck Palhinuk's Invisible Monsters (who, again spoilers but nbd, blows her face off with a gun because she thinks she's too beautiful). In short, Joker's Daughter is a new take on the face mutilation trope I've seen around, and an interesting take none-the-less. Then, she beats down the current Sewer Governer (leader of a small sewer-people tribe) and takes his Ruling Vest Made of Pennies (great detail). She mutilates all the men in the tribe and forces them to allow the women to become head of the house hold kinda like the Cheetah tribe from last week's Cheetah issue. Then she uses ugliness to control her subjects just like her father did to her. But wait? Why's she called Joker's daughter?! Joker had a kid, sent it to an unloving family in the suburbs, and is just waiting to take her back?!#$%! No, not at all. Before Joker's Daughter becomes governess of the sewer-trube, she finds Joker's old face floating in the sewer lake! Remember in Death of the Family when Joker's cut off face disappeared (I don't, but I assume that happened), well this girl found it. And, since she cut off her own face, she wears it perfectly. So she's not really Joker's daughter at all, more of a spiritual daughter, a kindered spirit? And to be honest, this character is not going to make a big impact on the DCU for at least a while. She's going to be a villain on Catwoman, which I suspect is the Batfamily's lowest read title (total guess here). So maybe one day Joker will meet his spawn, but that day won't be until at least 2014 (again, total guess). The only thing I didn't like was the cover, which makes the character's bust too big (the comic says she's anorexic and her bust is much smaller inside the book) and making her look like a dirty porn teen was weird. Plus the 3-D was bad. Regardless, 5 Severed Sewer Faces out of 5.

Bane (Batman 23.4)

People always joked that Bane looks like a Luca Librea wrestler--and now he is one! Or at least, he's Mexican, uses wrestling moves, and acts very theatrical. He is not, however, the badass Bain from the Dark Knight Rises. He's a militant Latin figure who steals chemical Bain-toxin from the military (because like all South American Communists, he wants our expensive chemical weapons). Then he commandeers a ship, sails to that super-jail that got broken into in Forever Evil 1 (was that Arkham?) and breaks everyone out. It's a set up to Forever Evil: Arkham War (of course it is). Really, the best part is the wrestling in the beginning and when Bane punches a little girl because she gently touches his hand. This book is pretty dumb, but funny too! 3 Skull Wrestling Masks out of 5.

Killer Croc (Batman & Robin 23.4)
This issue is kind of boring and definitely contradictory to the awesome Killer Croc plots set up in Batwoman (with art by Franco Francavilla). We get to see Croc as a little kid, as a circus performer, and a petty crook--until the end of the issue where Croc ascends to king of the sewer criminals! This is where the aforementioned Batwoman story picks up; Croc's king, and then finds out he's also the prophet of a strange race of reptile people who have been around for centuries. One of the reasons J.H. Williams quit Batwoman is because he couldn't pursue this storyline, which sucks because it seems like it'd make Croc a prophet to the Reptilian (David Icke's idea that the world is run by reptiles in disguise). To DC's credit, that's very similar to Night of the Owls; it'd turn Gotham into a city crawling with masonic-esque crime syndicates. The issue offers but a glimpse of King Croc, though we do see a lot about crooked cops that run the dock. It seems one of the cops was nice to kid Croc once. I don't care. I really only care about the sewer criminals and the Reptilian. Maybe the sewer territory will come back in Forever Evil: Arkham War. 2 Shapeshifting Alien Reptile Kings out of 5.

Man-Bat (Detective Comics 23.4)

I love Man-Bat. This issue was pretty perfect for a Man-Bat story, offering new twists on the character and amazing Man-Bat-Action! It starts with Man-Bat and She-Bat, continues to a humanization of the dude who actually turned into Man-Bat (yes, total Jackel/Hyde rip-off, but it's always been), and ends with Man-Bat the Vigilante! I like Man-Bat a lot: he's a monster with bat genes, yes--but he can be so much more. Usually, he's just a goon or a menace (or in video games, a substandard boss). He's hard to kill, and that's about as far as most writers take him. Then you get Grant Morrison making a bunch of ninja Man-Bat clones, which is interesting, but still making him a soldier. I like the freak of super-science Man-Bat--and making him into a vigilante ups the ante on this! Of course he'd try and do good, he was trying to do good when he made a serum that turns people into Bat-Men; likewise, of course he'd screw up, over do it, and kill people--because he made a stupid Bat-Men serum! Also, great art in this issue--some really great She-Bat on Man-Bat violence in those first pages. I'll stick around for the Detective run if it keeps up this quality. 5 Screeches of Justice out of 5. 

Superman

Metallo (Action Comics 23.4)
Metallo is a sad villain, as he is but a pawn of the military industrial complex. The US military wants to put a super soldier inside of a mecha suit. They do, and even pay to upgrade it for a painstaking three years. During this time, the soldier inside of Metallo is forced to sit in lonely isolation. Of course, he goes insane after three years. Then, he goes to Iraq, kills a bunch of innocent people--but it's not his fault! He internalized military doctrine, then went crazy after years of super-science experiments in sensory deprivation! So, the US general sets a new mecha suit solider (this one likely also crazy, but still follows orders) and the two "die" in a self-distruct explosion. If the comic ended there, it would have been a really refreshing one shot. But no, it somehow connects to Forever Evil: Arkham War, because Scarecrow comes and gives Metallo a coin. Whatever. Still a solid Superman one-shot, 4 Military Weapons Gone Awry out of 5.

Parasite (Superman 23.4)

Parasite used to be a deadbeat bike messenger who accidentally rode his bike into a living pile of evil goo. Then, after a trip to STAR labs, he was found to be Parasite! A really strong super-monster guy who can absorb energy. This is overall dumb. But, the fight between Superman and Parasite is pretty awesome. If Superman hits him with an attack, he absorbs it! Neat. But, it says this takes place between Superman 20-22 on the first page, implying that this story doesn't matter at all. It sets up nothing at the end. And, like I said, it's pretty dumb. But the art was good. Superman is in it, which is weird. I like how Parasite can be both a creepy alien looking dude, and a gigantic mass of digusting goo muscle. But honestly, is that a reason to spend $4 on this? No. 2 Bike Messenger Accidents out of 5. 

Doomsday (Batman & Superman 3.1)
Throughout this month, Greg Pak's been weaving together a really bad ass history for pre-explosion Krypton. I understand why Zod betrayed Krypton, started a false war, and harnessed Doomsday now. I see why the planet was on the path to extinction. In some ways, the New 52 Krypton is a warning: if you get too militaristic, too caught up in scientific progress, too modern for your own good, you die. Also, I love Pak's detailing of how Krypton came to be. Pictured below is the House of El, an old faction of Supermen who roamed the universe long before earth's creation. This is the perfect sounding book: I badly want a miniseries about these people. Also, it turns out Doomsday can talk through Zod, and the both tell their origin to baby Supergirl. I wish Pak was allowed to write every Villains issue, because then the Super universe could have done something really interesting in unifcation. Alas, there does not seem to be a Superman U. Forever Evil continuation. Whatever the case, at least we get Doomsday made of plasma energy. 5 Negative Zones out of 5.

Justice League

Secret Society (Justice League 23.4)

This book isn't about the old-school Secret Society, but instead the Earth-3 evil-versions of our favorite heroes that make the whole Villains month--and Forever Evil--possible. I liked what we learned here. How Owl-Man lost his Nightwing; why he imprisoned our Nightwing; what it's like for the Joker on Earth-3; how Evil-Alfred was able to plan the dimension swap that allowed Forever Evil. However, the story was told rather dryly. Also the art was weird, it looks like 2-D computer models placed in a 3-D background. I still haven't read Trinity War, but I assume there's more Earth-3 somewhere. I really hope that the world sticks around somehow, maybe the same way Earth-1 exists with occasional graphic novel releases. This issue balances progressing the event narrative, delves out backstory, and fixes old gaps. 3 Evil Alfreds out of 5.

Black Adam (Justice League of America 7.4)
How convenient is it that the Shazam hardcover comes out today and so does this great Black Adam one shot! With this issue, Black Adam becomes one of the most politically charged villains in the DCU. Some might argue, this interpretation of the character is questionably racist toward middle-eastern people. On the first page, we flashback to an unspecified Arab country where a brutal dictator is seen ruling with a spiked-club. He's a brutal despot putting these Arabian people down--until Black Adam comes to liberate them in the name of freedom and lighting! Uhh...well, thousands of years later, an Arabian man against the war between the Middle East and the US (again, it's vague, which makes it kinda racist but also kinda allegorical), finds a mystic scroll. He is accidentally killed by friendly fire from the Arabian army, and his wife yells Shazam! to make him into Black Adam. Black Adam beats up the Arabian army, storms into the Arabian palace, and smashes the leader of Unnamed Arab Country on the head with a rock. Then, he sits atop a throne and declares no rulers! Ultimate freedom! All of this stuff sounds like racist American propaganda--but might actually be astute American satire in consideration that Black Adam is a villain. See, perhaps the allegory could be, Black Adam is the USA. He's trying to "liberate" Arabia (is that even a real place?), but the only way he knows how is by electrocuting everybody with lightening. Yeah, that's about right. Overall, this month showed me, I need to stop ignoring Geoff Johns work. I just thought of a blog-post to rectify this. 4 Evil American Super-Villains out of 5.

Aquaman/Green Lantern/Wonder Woman

Ocean Master (Aquaman 23.2)
Ocean Master thinks he's the rightful heir to the Atlantian throne--though, I bet Aquaman begs to differ. I've never heard of this dude before, but he's actually pretty neat. He can do everything Aquaman can do, but he can also touch you and make you bloat and rot like a fish. It's gross. He breaks out of jail (as seen in Forever Evil) but can't help himself from saving humans he empathizes with. Like the guard who brought him water (he mercy kills) or a mother with an 8 year old son (he talks to). But all and all, the dialogue in this comic comes off sounding corny, like Ocean Master should gleefully cackle after his every line. I like the art, but I'm still not going to start reading Aquaman. No matter how hard DC tries, I doubt I ever will. 3 Ocean Oligarchies out of 5.

Sinestro (Green Lantern 23.4)

I finally understand the backstory of Green Lantern's "greatest foe?" I do not know if that's the case, but Sinestro is definitely cool. He's also a Fascist alien overlord, like all the other Green Lantern villains. In a way, the Green Lantern Federation is a United Nations-esque organization that defends against the tyranny of fascism throughout the universe. Matt Kindt pens an exciting and comprehendible origin for Sinestro, told from the character's point of view. Sinestro used to be a powerful Green Lantern. In his "brilliance," he decided to build a crime-free sanctuary planet instead of policing an entire galactic sector like a Lantern is supposed to do. To accomplish this crime-free planet, Sinestro creates super-powered police robots and constantly survailes all citizens, all the time, including their location, productivity and heartrate! It's like NSA times...uh, I dunno ten? Maybe twenty? Regardless, Hal Jordan freaks out and Sinestro is banished to the anti-matter universe. There, he creates the Yellow Lantern rings and becomes that nefarious purple bad guy we all know and love today. So where does Sinestro Corps fit in? Are they bad guys? And was the initial Sinestro Green Lantern title at the beginning of the New 52 in the past? Each week, my Lantern curiosity grows. 4 Yellow Power Rings out of 5. 

First Born (Wonder Woman 23.2)
This simple story was told well with great accompanying art. It was also written by Brian Azzerallo, so that's nice. Ares learns from three Oracles (who've shapeshifted into the bodies of three girls from the inner-city) that the First Born is just that. He's the first born child of Zeus and Herra. He was cast from Mount Olympus and condemned to earth. He quickly learned how to survive--through sheer hatred--and built a giant castle. Then, he challenged Heaven to a war. He lost and fell into a giant pit for 7000 years. Now he's back for a rematch with Heaven. This sounds like a passable Greek myth. I am not caught up on Wonder Woman, but I can only assume First Born will be the next story arc. 4 Abandoned Infant Gods out of 5.

Point Total: 45/60

Come back tomorrow for the overall point total and a event wrap up!

Villains' Month Reviews pt. 3!

Two weeks down, two more to go. Books have been either origin stories or Forever Evil tie-ins. Whatever the case, this event extended the New 52 universe bigger than before! Let's find out which books are good this week with points!

Batman

Scarecrow (Detective Comics 23.3)
It’s common knowledge that Batman has the coolest villains; in a way, his rogues are the reason this month-long event can happen. Now, it’s revealed all the Batman comics are connected! Scarecrow teeters on the brink of sanity as an ex-psychologist turned madman. Can he keep himself focused, and his ambitions in check, to become the ring-leader of a Gotham crime syndicate made from ex-Arkham Asylum inmates who want to rule he city? Find out in Forever Evil: Arkham War (a comic I’m going to have to keep reading post-Villains’ Month). This issue’s Scarecrow is delightfully meta--talking directly at the reader, looking past the panel, and explaining the conventions of villain stories. Thankfully, we don’t here anything about Scarecrow’s origin (not only did that already happen in Batman: The Dark Knight, almost every other freaking book is an origin). Instead, we see how a crazy bad guy can convince other crazy bad guys to listen to him. The book’s a little confusing as it references issues that come out next week, but I bet everything will sorta make sense come Arkham War. 4 Burlap Masks out of 5. 

The Penguin (Batman 23.3)

After being usurped by Emperor Penguin--a stronger, scarier, and more ruthless penguin-themed crime boss from a recent Detective Comics run--Penguin is forced to relegate his crime skills to running a casino. After some punk magicians tell Penguin he’s no longer scary, he loses it and shows them who’s scary. Then, when a senator tells Penguin he’ll have to close his casino, Penguin frames him for prostitute murder and makes the guy go all R. Budd Dwyer. This issue was neat because it told a self-contained Penguin story without being an origin or a tie in. Honestly, not enough books did this. Plus, Penguin’s pretty funny--you almost want to root for the creep. The art is good too--look how menacing that hook nose protrudes!
4 Weaponized Umbrellas out of 5.

Ra Al Ghul's League of Assassins (Batman and Robin 23.3)
This pseudo-origin tale doesn’t reveal Ra Al Ghul’s he genesis, but rather shows the massive scope required to become an all-powerful cult leader, martial artist, and necromancer. Al Ghul’s started creating the League since before 1285AD. We see Ghul’s influence increase throughout the 20th century, garnering more and more power. Eventually, he finds Batman and mistakes this meeting as his chance to harness the perfect man. Of course, we know Batman is the only person who can truly topple the League of Assassins. Batman already wrecked Al Ghul’s psyche by accidentally killing his daughter and grandson. One man built the League, one man is going to bring it down. Ghul refuses to join the fun of Forever Evil and instead opts to set up an upcoming story in Red Hood and the Outlaws (which I’ll never read). Unfortunately, we learn nothing more about Ghul’s dungeon full of Damien clones despite everyone ever desperately wanting to know more about it. 3 Lazarus Pits out of 5.

Clayface (Batman the Dark Knight 23.3)

Clayface is a stupid idiot and he hates being reminded so. That’s the main point of this basically pointless one-shot. It starts with Clayface doing muscle for a heist in the sewer. When the scam’s leader calls Clayface dumb, he murders everyone (and totally proves their point). Then, it flashes back to Clayface’s time as an actor. He admits to having quite a temper, and says that he “became Clayface” in an act of revenge against a director he beat up (for calling him an idiot, of course). This is a really weird origin--Clayface willingly choosing to be a monstrous freak because of a grudge. Anyway, Clayface finds out there’s a Secret Society of villains, tries to get a membership, but can’t because he’s a stupid idiot. Upon finding this out, he kills everyone (again, proving their point). Then, Clayface signs up for a gold heist, and decides to kill everyone: because he’s a stupid idiot. Unlike the Clayface of Batman: The Animated Series, who was tragic, not stupid, and became Clayface on accident, I don’t care about this character at all. Plus, the Clayface character design is too blocky and clean. He’s a melting monstrosity. He should look creepier. 2 Mutant Face Putty Creams out of 5.

Superman

Lex Luther (Action Comics 23.3)
This issue details the events in Lex Luthor’s life leading directly up to Forever Evil. His escape from prison, plastic surgery to fix a gross face burn, his control of the space program, and his ruthless murdering streak (don’t get in his way). I like the New 52 Luther because he demonstrates how evil and selfish industrial capitalists always act. This issue is kind of stagnent though, and doesn’t do much for the Forever Evil plot as a whole. The art is nice, as seen in the Robot Luther splash page above. Overall though, nothing much happens here. 
2 Robot Mecha Suits out of 5.

He'l (Superman 23.3)

Scott Lobdel writes really boring comics. There’s way too much text in this confusing story and all of it sounds stilted and strange. He’l was put in a coma, but then he wakes up, and decides to rule Krypton (see imbedded image). Zod and Jor-El team up to try and stop He’l, but they fail. We’re supposed to buy Superman Annual #2, but I won’t do that. This story is the opposite of Greg Pak’s Zod issue from last week; where that makes you want to find out more about Krypton  pre-explosion, the characters in this He’l issue make you glad the rock blew up when it did. The only redeeming aspect to this book is the art, which manages to tell the story way more efficiently than you’d expect with such a clunky script. 2 Prodigal Alien Sons out of 5. 

Justice League

Dial E for Enemy! (Justice League 23.3)

A fitting final farewell to my favorite DC comic. Dial Q (for Qued) gets you a super-villain power. Likely, Dial V was reserved for Vehicle. Somebody gets ahold of a Q dial, and a new artist draws a new villain on every page. The Centipede, of course, wants the dial back for himself (and his employer), but the dial proves too powerful...or maybe just, unpredictable? Whenever the case, obviously the art is awesome. The complexity of a concept like this would be lost if not for China Meiville. Only he can balance the insanity. When you read closely, Dial H the series works exactly like a super-dial: it has a vast and beautiful logic that you're never going to figure out. 5 Imagination Generators out of 5.

Eclipso (Justice League Dark 23.3)

Apparently, Eclipso’s been running all over the New 52 fringe and all I’ve done is miss him. He’s in Demon Nights, Catwoman, Sword of Sorcery, and Team 7 (I’ve never even heard of those last two). Apparently, he’s a demon that lives in a crystal and needs a human host to escape. This story is adequately creepy--the demon convinces his human hosts that he can make their lives perfect, then just ruins them worse than ever before--making Eclipso the prime personification of sheer evil. Plus, the art is amazing--very moody with strange and effective paneling. The story’s end doesn’t really pay-off to anything (it’s neither connected to Forever Evil nor a future story arc), but it was still a fun read. Now, I want to go explore those crannies of the New 52 I missed. 3 Black Magic Crystals out of 5.

Shadow Thief (Justice League of America 23.3)
I have no idea who Shadow Thief is. She hardly seems like a villain, although she's a spy. She wears a cool suit made of shadows and exposes a government conspiracy run by aliens. Both cool, not necessarily villain things. Shadow Thief is kind of a mix between Trinity from the Matrix and Aeon Flux from the cartoon. The story is fine, but doesn't build to much and doesn't connect to anything else. It's about a spy who finds out their employers are not who they seem. Apparently Shadow Thief is a Marv Wolfman creation, who initially fought Hawkman. She was in Crisis, Infinite Crisis, she's stuck around. I'm not sure why, but maybe it's because her costume is cool and she is sexy. Actually that's probably why. 3 Dimensiometers out of 5.

Green Latern/Flash/Swamp Thing/Wonder Woman/Teen Titans

The Rogues (Flash 23.2)

The Flash books have been a standout in this event, for they both advance the main book's story and the event's story simultaneously. Grodd called back to an old arc before he became a main villain; Reverse-Flash was hiding in the background all along); now The Rogues both pledge to defend Emerald City and try and rule it. I guess that's also a reoccuring theme building in Villains month. Bad guys want to rule stuff. Anyway, the team dynamic of the Rogues is just like old timey bad guys, they have a code. I bet if this book was a monthly series it'd be regularly interesting. The Rogues steal a million dollars, have reservations about splitting it up, and Captain Cold details an origin. The story is kind of all over the place, and the dialogue is lame (someone says cray-cray as a dramatic line) but the concepts are neat. 4 Anti-Heroes out of 5.

Black Hand (Green Lantern 23.3) 
I love the color symbolism in the DCU. Green is growth, like plants (Swamp Thing; Green Lantern; Poison Ivy). Red is life (Animal Man). Black is rot (Anton Arcane, Black Lanterns). Black Hand is a necromancer lantern soldier who's power ring can raise the dead and rot the living. I think he was a main villain in Blackest Night (every week, my Green Lantern ignorance embarrasses me more and more). In this issue, Black Hand goes around, kills some cops, and raises a cemetery of dead bodies. It's totally awesome. I hope soon a cross over with the red, green, and black occurs (but one bigger than Rotworld). The art in this comic is also interesting; not as technical as Jim Lee, but more in the emotive style of Jeff Lemire. It's really dark and evocative. One day, I'll know what Green Lantern is all about--until then, I'll just be like a little kid who thinks, "Aw man! This is neat and confusing!" whenever I read his books. 4 Death Grips out of 5. 

Arcane (Swamp Thing 23.1)

Perhaps my love of Swamp Thing makes me bias, but this was one of the most interesting and complex issues so far of the (villains') month. It's titled, "Arcane", not Anton Arcane. He's there, and we get to see his life after Rotworld failed (he's in a Garden of Eden paradise, which to him is hell because nothing can ever rot). Rotworld also set Abigail Arcane as the new avatar of the black (so Swampy's sworn nemesis) and we get to see what's going on with her too. In flashback, we see the entwined origin of Anton Arcane's terrible fathering (which makes it more understandable that Abby might have an Oedipal-inspired longing for her father's direct opposite, a man made of plant matter). We see Abby's traumatic life on the run from her evil father. But the story also extends the mythology of the New 52 Swampy (a girl Swamp Thing makes a one panel appearance). This issue certainly does a lot of stuff, but it doesn't read like anything more than a good story that's answering questions set up since Swamp Thing 1. It looks like Anton Arcane is going to escape prison and come for Swampy (well of course he will, he always does), but how will Abby's role as the Rot's avatar effect this? The issue is even able to set up questions for the future of the series. 5 Rotting Rabbit Feasts out of 5.

Cheetah (Wonder Woman 23.1)

Brain Azzarello made waves by changing Wonder Woman's nemesis from Cheetah to Ares. And this pretty good origin issue makes a case for why Cheetah still cool. Cheetah was a woman named Barbra Minerva. Raised in a female tribe of Amazonian-esque warriors, Cheetah was forced to participate in a brutal hunting ritual, resulting in her getting stabbed with an ancient God-killing sword. When a non-God gets stabbed, they turn into a god--or more specifically, a Cheetah person. Cheetah also has a strange habit of eating her enemies hearts. This issue shows an interesting civilization seemingly run by fascist, Spartan-like women (I didn't think the Amazons killer their young senselessly). However, I'm overall glad that New 52 Wonder Woman's greatest foe isn't a jungle-cat lady. That idea is only so cool (especially compared to the vast, historical epicness of Ares: God of War). The issue ends with Cheetah getting caught up in the battle of Forever Evil, so let's see how that goes. 3 Enemy Hearts out of 5.

Deathstroke (Teen Titans 23.2)
Deathstroke is a gun for hire in the war on terror. He fights other assassins, reveals his origin as a bomb expert guy in the Bosnian war, (like the main character in the Hurt Locker), kills a Latin American president, and explains his motivation for killing for hire: money to will to his daughter. The story is just fine, but the art is fantastic. There’s a bullet that looks like it’s shooting out from the page, like Frank Quitely’s art in We3. Plus, two-page spread where Deathstroke rides a gigantic rocket. Even a sweet bullet that pops out of Deathstroke’s eye socket. Just look at how well the above panel spread conveys the action! 4 Teen Killers out of 5.

Point Total: 48/70

Villains' Month Reviews pt. 2!

And we're back! Last week, we entered the Villain Void. This week we go further with more one-shots, but no Forever Evil #2! That's not until October...weird. Keep track of the points!

Batman

Riddler 
The New 52 version of the Riddler is essentially a well-prepared, but bitter, nerd. Hardly anybody gets him! Despite his verbal manipulation skills, punning, rhyming, foreshadowing, etc. Perhaps this Riddler is an angry autistic savant. Nobody really gets the guy except Batman, who's willing to indulge considering hyper-specific historical/literary/mathematics allusions because he's a genius. The Riddler is saddened by Batman's absence. He anxiously waits his return, killing time by killing people. I bet Scott Snyder thought up a lot of the Riddler concepts: it's cool, but I prefer a Riddler that's way crazier, and thus, equally ruthless--a la Hush. Different is fine I guess. What makes me really dig this is the structure and the end twist, which I bet was Ray Fawkes doing. 4 Question Mark Pinstripe Zoot Suits out of 5.

Mr. Freeze (Batman: The Dark Knight 23.2)
Last year's Batman annual #1 by Scott Snyder was an excellent Mr. Freeze one shot, readapting the many Freeze origins and creating something new. Snyder's Freeze is humanized (like the one from Batman: The Animated Series) but way crazier. Jimmy Palmonati and Justin Grey (perhaps the most reliable writers on the DC payroll), deepen the insanity. Freeze has a strange psychiatric syndrome that constantly needs love and control. That's why he freezes people all the time. Freeze is ruthless, compassionate, intelligent and delusional--a man of many layers. Plus, the art uses some clever paneling to tell the story with wide splash pages and tiny panels. Another good book. 5 Freeze Guns out of 5.


Harley Quinn (Detective Comics 23.2)

Matt Kindt (of Mind MGMT) sets up his upcoming Suicide Squad arc with this very solid issue. Kindt seeks to reconcile the many versions of Harley Quinn into one unified Harley Quinn with multiple personality disorder. She's been a psychiatrist, Joker's slave, Joker's sidekick, a villain free agent, a member of the anti-hero crime/fighting team, The Suicide Squad, and now all those things. "I'm more of a collage now. A mosaic," Harley says as while staring into a splintering mirror.  I hope Kindt does this for every Suicide Squad member, as the DC Firestorm heroes keep getting everything cool about them edited out. Great script, but obnoxious art. Harley looks cartoony and childish simultaneously, while still being grossly-oversexualized and impossibly proportioned. Look at the cover: she has tiny twig arms, yet she's holding a gigantic wooden mallet only Bane could reasonably swing. Maybe I'd suspend disbelief and buy that Harley could swing a comically-oversized mallet if she wasn't wearing a corsette! That would make everything so much harder--everything except exposing stupidly oversized boobs to the hypothetical teenage audience that still reads comics, yet I've never seen one  ever. You know who might draw a great Harley Quinn? Matt Kindt. 4 Sexy Clown Babies out of 5

The Court of Owls (Batman and Robin 23.2)
This issue reads like outtakes from Scott Snyder's Court of Owls story line. While some of the scenarios are neat (the first Talon loved killing prostitutes as much as Jack the Ripper), all of them show the Court menacing Gotham the way Snyder intended. They've been there all the time, they've infiltrated the police, they trap their enemies in a scary labyrinth, etc. Almost nothing is different. The art is interesting: very moody, shaky, and sort of like a digitally colored Gotham Central. This sets up a story in Talon, a book I forgot existed. 2 Conspiratorial Crime Syndicates out of 5.

Superman

Brainiac (Superman 23.2)
Brainiac used to just be an alien, then he was a robot, then he was a computer: now he's a mishmash of all those things! Brainiac is a ruthless alien genius that can broadcast his consciousness into computers and robots. After being dejected from his species for experimenting on his infant son (he tried to build a bigger baby brain), Brainiac goes crazy and murders all his own people. Then he destroys Krypton (as revealed in Grant Morrison's Action Comics run) and terrorizes the universe. The art on this story is perfect. It's clean, but other world.y And, like Harley Quinn, it does a good job bridging the many disjointed versions of Brainiac into one. It's Grant Morrison inspired story telling that totally works. Brainiac even mentions he's tapped into the powers of the fifth dimension, where all the heroes are currently fighting. If we remember the words of Bat-Mite, "The Fifth Dimension is just imagination!", thus every superhero is a representation of unconscious trauma projected through imagination...right? 5 Miniature Civilizations Frozen in Bottles out of 5.

Zod (Action Comics 23.2)
Greg Pak knows how to make the inter-workings of pre-explosion Krypton fascinating. Zod is the estranged brother of Jor-El. As a child, Zod watched his father create cool space monsters to fight other evil space monsters persecuting Krypton. The monster escaped, killed Zod's family, and chased Zod into the wilderness--where he became the best warrior Krypton ever saw. But more about Krypton: the planet is a essentially a utopia because every citizen is utilized to make the city better. But there's still other-worldly problems to deal with--monster attacks; alien invasions--that create the required civic unity for perfect society. It seems like the elders are tyrants, yet benevolent (thanks to scientific augmentation): there must be proof before you're exiled to the Phantom Zone (remember Superman II?). Pak's Krypton is a smart, Dune-esque twist on space opera. I wish there was a series set 1000 years before Krypton explodes to show Krypton's origin Good week for Super-fans, 5 False Wars out of 5.

Justice League
Lobo (Justice League 23.2)

Lobo is an intergalactic alien badass. In the 90s, he was DC's version of Ghost Rider, in that he rode a motorcycle and acted ultra-violent. New 52 Lobo is revealed, as revealed in this issue, is a stylish intergalactic bounty hunter/smuggler. Essentially, he's evil Han Solo. Some violent stuff happens (see imbedded image). Then, he sells some slaves. Finally, the end of the issue reveals that this new Lobo is the true Lobo, and the Lobo we all know and love is just an impostor! The end? Hopefully not! I like New Lobo and his ultra-violent comic book is everything you'd think it be (except everybody's blood is blue).
3 Grizzled Anti-Heroes out of 5. 

Solomon Grundy (Earth 2 15.2)
Matt Kindt writes a creepy New 52 origin for Solomon Grundy. Of course, all Grundy really says is his creepy nursery rhyme, but this proves how effective Kindt is at visual story telling. The timeline alternates between Grundy's most recent resurrection, and Grundy's first resurrection in the sad swamp. The repetition of the rhyme becomes all the more tragic knowing that this sad, zombie man will never have the peace of dying. This origin also drops two interesting details: Grundy can make stuff rot, and he's after the "green man". Sounds like Swamp Thing territory to me! A Green Lantern/Swamp Thing cross over would be boss (Swampy was the coolest part of Blackest Night). I won't spoil Grundy's swamp origin because Matt Kindt writes one heck of a one shot 5 Monday Births out of 5.

Killer Frost (Justice League of America 7.2)
Another of the DCU's many ice villains (Mr. Freeze; Captain Cold), Killer Frost is most obscure. Frost is an old Firestorm villain (that Jim Lee refuses to forget), who's had her origin reduxed three times since moving to DC in the 2000s. She was a terrorist, a member of a secret society, and now she's a brilliant super scientist. The first ten pages outline how Killer Frost got her powers. Working in an Antarctic super-lab, Frost tried creating a perpetual motion machine--Why perpetual motion would give you ice powers (and not heat powers) I have no idea. But, her scientist colleagues can't allow such a machine to exist, as their benefactors make too much money from fossil fuel. Again, one perpetual motion machine wouldn't immediately effect personal fuel consumption, it would change the current perceptual paradigm of how we perceive the physical world by breaking a thermodynamic law (something all scientists find neat). Ok, so the "science"is bunk, but that can be forgiven if Firestorm then used her powers creatively. Nope. She chases Firestorm for a page, goes to the Forever Evil pull-out meet-and-greet, and at the end of the issue, she resolves to die without Firestorm around. The art was fine. 2 Icicle Haircuts out of 5.

Flash/Teen Titans/Green Lantern/Aquaman

Reverse-Flash (Flash 23.1)
This was a cool origin involving time travel. Plus, the time travel connects events from the rest of Flash in a subtle way. In issue 0, when Flash stopped a bank robbery, he was actually putting Reverse-Flash in jail (he was just Daniel then). When all those gorillas invaded Central City and the Rogues tried saving the day, Daniel punched Heatwave in the face! And when Heatwave tried to shoot him with fire, he drove straight through mirror world in an explosion that would make him Reverse-Flash! There's also a sad story about child abuse, but the ending is cool so I won't spoil it. As always, the art on the Flash books is tops. Really awesome use of two page spreads (also looks great on screens). I usually find New 52 Flash too goofy, but this story nicely balances characters, plot, fun, and super-speed. 4 Time Traveling Sprints out of 5.

Trigon (Teen Titans 23.1)
Teen Titans legend Marv Wolfman returns to the Teen Titans...kind of? Trigon is Raven's demon dad (spoiler alert). This issue details his rise to power--from sucking the energy straight from a planet's heart!--to his ruthless galactic conquest. Trigon looks like a Satanic goat man. Fitting, as he forces one female of every planet he meets to bare his demon spawn ("You will be both my bride...and my mother," Trigon says very creepily). Then, a Trigon is born, grows up and destroys the world. Somehow, Raven is exempt from this destiny, possibly because she's a girl. Not sure. Otherwise, fine story, wish Wolfman got a chance to do something with a teen team dynamic though. 3 Space Devils out of 5.

Mongul (Green Lantern 23.2)
Of course the creator of Thanos, Jim Starlin, knows how to write about crazy space tyrants. Mongul, leader of Warworld, finds his planet under attack by a bug-alien armada. He invites an ambassador in and shows off how ruthless Warworld truly is. After first killing his twin, then killing his parents, Mongul dedicated himself to become supreme authority of all! He nuked his planet into submission, built it back up into a galactic military base, and dedicates all energy to war! Check out these four panels where Mongul explains the civic structure of Warworld, You're either a warrior, a janitor, or dead. Brutal. How do you think Mongul deals with the ambassador? 4 Galactic Fascists out of 5.

Black Manta (Aquaman 23.1) 
I only know Aquaman's greatest foe from Hanna Barbara's Super Friends. He wore a scuba suit and shot a harpoon. In the New 52, his origin is interlinked with Aquaman's. Trying to steal Aquaman's blood, Black Manta accidentally gave Aquaman's father a heart attack. So, Aquaman went on Black Manta's boat late at night and killed Black Manta's father aiming for revenge. Lots of sad dad in the ocean it seems. After Manta gets Aquaman's trident in Forever Evil #1, he goes to his father's grave. Ultra-man (Superman's evil mirror identity) moves the moon, screwing up the tides, and flooding Black Manta's father's grave. If there's one thing this guy hates, it's people messing with his dad. This was kind of a dumb segue to Forever Evil, but now I have a better understanding of the scuba guy with the harpoon gun. 3 Flooded Graves out of 5.

Point Total! 49/65

Villains' Month Reviews pt. 1!

Villains are overrunning the New 52 DC U! But does that make for interesting comic books? Let's see as I review all 56 issues, every Wednesday this month! We'll count the points at the end!

Forever Evil #1/7
Forever Evil is the seven part mini-series that ties the whole event together. It's pretty fun--good writing, quick pacing, and great art. Plus, it's long (36 pgs) and shows the villains doing really evil stuff (what you paid for). If you read Trinity War (I didn't), you'll remember the Alfred of Earth-3 (Earth-3 is an evil universe where all out same DC heroes exist, but are super-evil and form a evil crime syndicate instead of a league of justice) opened a inter-dimensional rift between Earth-Prime and (evil) Earth-3. The bad superheroes "killed" the good superheroes, and are now primed and ready to take over Earth-Prime! They enlist every villain in the DCU as their personal army and brutally reveal Nightwing's identity to the entire world. Who will save the DCU? Perhaps the Teen Titans. Maybe the Suicide Squad. But most likely, Lex Luthor, as he's his own boss and doesn't like being told what to do (plus they spent a lot of page time on him). Everybody knows the status quos will be reset, but how? Personally, I hope the Earth-2 heroes go through a riff to save the day. Overall, 4 Blockbuster Comic Events out of 5.

Batman

Joker (Batman 23.1) 

Everybody loves Joker! He's simultaneously diabolical, whimsical, hilarious and horrifying: a man of many contradictions. This issue, penned by Andy Kubert and illustrated by Andy Clarke, manages to capture all the Joker's many moods. It begins with a flashback to Joker's very disturbing childhood; remembering his abusive upbringing, Joker decides to settle down and become a father. Obviously, he then steals a baby gorilla from the zoo, names it Jackanapes, and feeds it ice cream sundaes to create the perfect killing machine. While this issue is quite silly, Clarke's art also makes it truly horrifying. Murders in the background include a man being eaten by a python, a gorilla holding closed the doors of a department store as the patrons claw their way out, a man being pulled to death by a forklift and gorilla. An issue of many moods, well worth a read. 4 Deranged Laughs out of 5.

Two-Face (Batman & Robin 23.1)

Two-Face resonates with readers because he represents nature's duality, or the cruel hand of fate...? However, nothing cool like that is in this issue. In fact, nothing much really happens at all. Veteran Batman writer, Peter J. Tomasi shows Two-Face going on a violence filled crusade through Gotham, capriciously killing bad guys by the choice of a coin flip. The first four pages of the book show Two-Face joining Scarecrow in alliance with the Villians--but the last page negates all of this. Really, this is a usual Two-Face story with worse than usual writing. However, Guillem March's art is fantastic: he really shows the horror of Two-Face's acid burns as well as small details like the coin face and the city scape. The art is the only thing that gives this book 2 Mutated Faces out of 5.

The Ventriloquist (Batman: The Dark Knight 23.1) 

The Ventriloquist with which I'm most familiar is Albert Fish, a nebbish fat dude who talks to a doll named Scarface (from Batman: The Animated Series) But Gail Simone's New 52 Ventriloquist is way different. Firstly, she's a woman. Second, she's telepathic. And most interesting of all, in contrast to the old Ventriloquist, she is not a shy person who lets her sadism out through puppetry. Instead, she's a total schizo who intimidates everyone, even the voice that occupies her puppet. This new Ventriloquist appeared in Batgirl, but this one-shot details her extra-creepy origin. I don't want to spoil anything, but  this is one of the best issues of the week granting 5 Murderous Puppets out of 5.

Poison Ivy (Detective Comics 23.1)

A good, perhaps bland, Poison Ivy origin story. The sexy villainess walks around a anarchic Gotham terrorizing both thugs and innocent people with plant life. The issue flashes back to Ivy's tumultious childhood, her years in college making experimental plant hormone hallucinogenics, and her time as a researcher for the Wayne Corporation. Interestingly enough, Bruce Wayne fires Ivy when she proposes they test plant mind control techniques--which causes Ivy to go insane, steal plants, and turn super-powered. Another instance in which Batman creates his own villains inadvertently. The book mention Ivy's history as an environmental rights "terrorist" and her close contact with the Green higher-conciousness of planet Earth made up in Moore's Swamp Thing, but just quickly. I wish for a Swampy v. Poison Ivy crossover all the time. This was heavy on exposition, but still a fun read, 3 Costumes Made of Vines out of 5.

Superman

Bizarro (Superman 23.1)

Hated this. Somebody (and I'm not blaming the script writer) castrated the Bizarro character, destroying the bizarro zone. But listen: in the New 52, Bizarro is just another Lex Luthor super-experiment gone wrong. He's a broken clone of Superman. While I think this may have been (don't know) the case since the 2000s, why get rid of bizarro zone!  Most of the issue is Luthor figuring out that Bizarro is powered by kryptonite and vulnerable to sunlight. Worst yet, Bizarro doesn't even talk bizarro! WTF! The issue's cartoony art doesn't help anything (looks nothing like cover art). In the bizarro universe, this is the best comic ever so in our universe it's 1 Comic Worst Ever out of 13 Comic Worst Ever.

Cyborg Superman (Action Comics 23.1) 

I was a little confused on first read through--but on second read, it's totally clear, this is a good comic. Brainiac finds a Kryptonian Superman robot and programs it to be as strong as Superman. Then, he instructs the machine to go across the universe and learn from any galactic fighter he can't kill. The robot ruthlessly tortures alien lifeforms as he destroys their world. There's also some drama on Krypton I didn't really understand. But all and all, Cyborg Superman is a cool concept and appropriately menacing. Plus, the art was good with lots of two page spreads that still look nice on a screen. 4 Mechanized Super-Intelligences out of 5.

Justice League

Darkseid (Justice League 23.1)
I love Darkseid, but I've never fully understood any Darkseid comic I've ever read (as the New Gods Omnibus trades linger on my shelf). Point is, I don't really know what happened in this issue but... The New Gods are making utopia, being gods and stuff, until the Old Gods come out and start destroying everything. This riles up those New Gods, and Darkseid destroys the god planet to make it into Apocalypse. The art is really cool, lots of neon explosions and fight scenes to get you through the exposition. Maybe this is better and I'm just dumb. 3 Planet Destroyers out of 5.

The Creeper (Justice League Dark 23.1) 

This is one of the issues I was most excited for. The Creeper's sometimes a good guy, sometimes a bad guy, but almost always a dude with a demon trapped in his body that makes him do bad things. Creeper stories often deliberately distort the line between good and bad and that's what makes them cool. This wildly collaborative effort--story by Dan Didio (of DC Editor fame), written by Ann Nocenti (of counter-culture journalism/weird comics fame) use three sets of inkists and colorists--could only work on a character like Creeper. From water color w/ laser swords to cartoonish tornado this book is weird looking. In the New 52, the Creeper is a Japanese demon/spirit who haunted the sword of a noble samurai warrior. Then, he went to hell, visited The Demon and stuff. Now's he back, inhabiting the body of a journalist, and making it his life's pursuit to screw up conventionality and normal life (read the embedded panel)! I love this guy! Also, as revealed by the continuity bubbles, he's been all over the DC Dark Universe for a few months now. Always great to have The Creeper around. I even bought the 3-D copy (sigh). 5 Perverse Imps out of 5.

Deadshot (Justice League of America 7.1)
Never heard of Deadshot until this issue, but he's pretty cool--kinda like a cross between Punisher and Bullseye. Deadshot is an assassin with such good aim, and technologically enhanced bullets, he can never miss. His origin is simple: his family was accidentally killed by machine gun fire in a wayward mob hit...Thankfully, Deadshot was scared by his hardcover western pulp novel. Without parents, he turned to crime, got paid to kill a guy, and now wants to avenge his dead family by making sure nobody elses family dies on accident. He jumps out of planes and kills guys. It's fluffy fun. 3 Technologically Enhanced Bullets out of 5.

Desaad (Earth 2 15.1)
Is this guy new? Desaad is an angel of death who looks a lot like Mum-Ra, or the Cryptkeeper. He scares people, and according to the last page he has a cartoonist slave in his underground lair who allows him travel between dimensions. Meta! Overall, I found this villain not menacing, not scary, and kinda stupid. Who's he fight? What's his powers? He's just a menace. Am I missing something? 2 Spooky Cloaks out of 5.

Green Lantern/Green Arrow/Flash

Relic (Green Lantern 23.1) 

This is the third Green Lantern comic I've ever read. But, I can tell you what's a good comic without even reading the words--let alone understanding them! This is a great looking book: the bursting neon colors, the vibrant action, the crazy character models. Look at that splash page below! Apparently, there's a light-maker who creates some anti-laterns (like the colored Lantern guys, but embodying bad traits like lying and sloth). Then he absorbed them? I dunno. This book looked great, had lots of one page spreads, and might be a good story. Where do I even start with Green Lantern. Huff. 4 White Lantern Rings out of 5.

Count Vertigo (Green Arrow 23.1)

I read one other issue of Jeff Lemire's Green Arrow and didn't like it; this one was better, if not confusing. This freakish boy has a computer in his brain that allows him awesome powers. He becomes a military weapon gone awry, and his training is really dark and mess-up (Weapon-X-esque). The book makes good use of first person POV shots, and the graphic design, Mark Waid Daredevil type of action scenes look unique. Plus the book has a really brutal ending. Cool read, makes me want to read the rest of Lemire's Green Arrow, 4 Mercy Killings out of 5. 

Grodd (Flash 23.1)

My favorite Grodd stories are ones that give glimpse into his "homeword", a hyper-intelligent tribe of gorilla-people stashed away on some hidden island. This issue starts with the gorilla leaders meeting human leaders to unveil a statue of the Flash. Since Flash frequently saves people and gorilla from the tyrannical Grodd, both groups can agree Flash is great even though often the needs of people (like industrialization and pollution) come into direct opposition with the needs of gorillas (like being a utopia democracy). Don't get me wrong: this story isn't about the criminally underused island tribe of hyper-intelligent gorillas at all. On page four, Grodd shows up, starts being a dick, and destroys the Flash statue (remember: he hates Flash). He reveals that while trapped in the speed force, he developed Flash powers (I can't tell if this is dumb or cool). Then, challenges every gorilla/the human army to a battle and becomes supreme overlord of both gorillas and people.  Quickly, Grodd realizes that even though he has exactly what he's always wanted (to be a overlording tyrant of everyone) he's become exactly what he despises (Flash). He can never be happy. The issue is continued into the Forever Evil story. Overall, this issue was corny but fun 3 Missing Links of Evolution out of 5. 

Point Total: 47/65

Come back next week! More villains! More points!